• Welcome! So Glad You’re Here!

    A Welcome Letter from Me!

    Welcome to BWBHBF. Women of purpose, women of valor, women of love, women of substance, welcome home. We’re changing the game, bursting through glass ceilings, defying old archetypes, raising futuristic children, crafting a new world that allows our daughters to thrive and our sons to live longer, fuller lives.  This site was born out of the understanding that driven women face more challenges during the day than most.  BWBHBF is here to offer new power, new focus, and fresh energy every day!  We give you inspiration that matches the challenges women like us have in life. We offer concentrated inspiration to help love you where you’re weak, protect you from the day’s offenses and fortify you where you’re strong. Our vision is to make the world a better place by freeing the spirit and genius of women and girls.

    Look for affirmations, articles, motivational videos, workshops, communion, constant conversation and the chance to dialogue with men who love women like you -some may even be available ;-).

    Sweet Living,

    Liza Ellen

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  • We Are! Right Now!

     

    I was born, “in pursuit”. It takes my Dad to tell you how I didn’t crawl or how I cried at 2 years old because I couldn’t speak like an adult. Frustration or a sense of being behind, is part of my gift and curse. No matter what I was doing, I was never where I wanted to be. If you’re even a little like me, there’s this wall between who you are every day and who you want to be. There’s this thought that attaining our “carrots” (a degree, an ideal size, a relationship status or a financial status) is the only way to validate our belief in who we truly are inside.

    Fortunately, I read some good books and met some good people who helped me to see, yes, ambition and drive may be my nature, but those personality traits should not control my identity. Becoming the woman I want to be is rooted in who I am, right now, as I am. The thing is, the inner self creates its external self. I had to learn that although I don’t have the ______(insert carrot here) I want, my dream is me, in utero. Every day, I am birthing myself into the external world.

    The possessions, the outside gratification of it all, is always last to arrive. You are a lover, long before you meet your mate. You are a great business person far before you reach your first million. Your ability to sing and create new ideas comes forth far before you release an album or write a book. You have to be it to do it.

    Our culture puts a tremendous amount to focus on external wealth rather than internal health. The pressure to have often eclipses our passion for being. We focus on attaining or looking like a million bucks before we focus on feeling like a million bucks. This “lead with the tail” mentality has caused so much illness and confusion. The key now, is to turn that philosophy around. Be what you dream, today. In our collective past, the goals were the carrot dangled before us, the work it took to get that carrot is what made many who they became. Let’s turn it around. Let’s fully believe in and act as who we dream to be, the carrots will come.

    My challenge to you (and me) is to let your goals follow your greatness. Writers, write. Dancers, dance. Nurturers, nurture, Business Women conduct business. Let the accolades follow the performance.

    Whatever you’re doing at work, at home… whatever you’re wearing or whatever is wearing you, is part of your process. The journey of you should not be lured across time by trophies, notoriety, goals and external wealth. The woman who is on the journey should live a healthy, whole, assured life, no matter how many tiny statues she wins.

    Choosing to believe that the woman of your dreams is you, now, is up to you, but I promise if you’re here, reading this, so is she.

     

    I’m a believer in homework so here you go: (I’ll show you mine if you show me yours)

    HOMEWORK:

    Do your “carrots” follow you or do you follow your carrots?

    Let’s pretend you never attain your “carrots”. Who are you without them?

    Can you love yourself if you never attain them?

    What is your greatest vision of yourself? How close are you to being the woman of your vision?

    What can you do today to release more of her?

    Are you living a “carrot” free life and loving it? If so, comment below and tell us how you’re doing you, right now!

    Stop what you’re doing right now and love yourself for all that you are, today! ;-)

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  • Inviting The Love You Want.

    - by Reginald Martin

    As human beings we are social creatures. We find joy in sharing our life with others. When we experience an event that is joyful in our lives the feelings multiply exponentially when we get to share it with others that are genuinely joyful for us as well.

    One of the reasons we seek a mate is to develop a bond that we may share experiences with. Experiences like having and raising children, going to a movie that makes you cry, having that sexual union that curls your toes and touches your soul. There is no doubt that all these experience are better when you are in concert with someone that shares and values those same experiences.

    But why is this type of love so difficult to find? Maybe you feel that you have loved and been burned so many times you just don’t want to try again. Let me tell you that the difficulty can be alleviated and love is there for the taking. However, it will take some work and a change in perspective that will have love overflowing in your life.

    There are many new age ideas floating around society today. Some I agree with and many I don’t. One that I believe to the core is that everything in our lives is a process of attracting it. I know many people don’t believe this idea, but realize that it has been around for thousands of years! On a deeper level all everything is in the universe is vibrating energy. Again, this idea is thousands of years old and confirmed by science today.

    Vibration and emotion are the same thing

    Your vibration is the key to attracting the type of love you want in your life. All that you are attracting and have attracted or not is due to your vibration. Your vibration is your state of being. It is the way you think and the way you feel at any moment in time. Are you optimistic or pessimistic about love? Not just when you think about it, but what is your core belief? Even your subconscious beliefs (the way you think infused with emotion and imagination) affect your vibration. Your subconscious beliefs have more power than you conscious beliefs because they are programs running at all times, even when you aren’t “thinking” about them.

    If your core belief is all the good ones are taken then your belief and vibration will attract the circumstances and people to reflect the belief back to you in your daily life. What you see in your life is a reflection of all that you are. It is a pattern of thinking that you must change if you want true and lasting love.

    How do I change this pattern

    First you must recognize your most prevalent thoughts around your ideas about love. It is impossible to track all of your thoughts. Don’t even try it. But you can recognize how you are feeling at any given moment about life in general. Paying attention to your emotions (your vibration) is key.

    Second if what you are feeling blah, down or just so so then CHOOSE to feel uplifted. Yes, you have the power to change your state of mind which will change how you are feeling, which changes your vibration, which will change what you are attracting. It is a process. But a process that you have power and control over.

    Third and most important is to love you. Choose to express that love for you in all aspects of your life. Do something nice for yourself just because. Recognize that you are worthy of love because you are here! No one’s opinion outside of you matters! This can be tough sometimes because of all the programing we have had when growing up. But all of this has to start with you. If you can’t love you, how will someone else?

    I stated this earlier that all that is outside of you is a reflection of your state of being. You have attracted it based on your predominant thoughts and beliefs about yourself and about life. To believe that you can find love when you don’t truly love and appreciate yourself is analogous to looking in a mirror and expecting the reflection to smile first. True love has always been and will always be an inside job. You have to invite love in by being love. It starts with loving you.

     

    Reginald Martn

     

    Reginald Martin is a spiritual life mentor and workshop leader to thought leaders, visionaries and creative individuals. His website is www.beyondthephysicalme.com

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